Written Sept 10
This past week was a challenge in many ways. It was the first time I was left in charge of Karis for over 1 day. Sara and Donna (a good friend from Texas) went on safari to South Luangwa, Zambia for 4 days leaving me and Mathilda entertaining Karis.
Day 1: The first day was business as usual, because Karis is used to being left a home during the day. I went to work and came back home to find Karis fed, bathed and ready to play. I really was a little disappointed that I was not doing those things, because I could handle taking care of my own child (but in some ways I was so thankful that Mathilda took care of the major things). Karis usually goes to sleep between 6:30 to 7:30 but I let her play and kept her entertained by watching her 1 set of DVDs. She finally went to sleep at 8:30 and that set the tone for the rest of the nights (sleeping between 8:30 to 9:00). Her sleep pattern was shot the first night! What could I have done, she knew her mother was missing and she needed the DVDs to settle her prior to going to sleep. Sara also had worked at getting her to sleep in her own crib and that also was shot. I needed to keep her close so I could wake up if she woke up in the middle of the night and so from the first night on, she wouldn’t even take day naps in her crib the whole time. We had to place her on our bed in order to get her to take a nap.
This past week was a challenge in many ways. It was the first time I was left in charge of Karis for over 1 day. Sara and Donna (a good friend from Texas) went on safari to South Luangwa, Zambia for 4 days leaving me and Mathilda entertaining Karis.
Day 1: The first day was business as usual, because Karis is used to being left a home during the day. I went to work and came back home to find Karis fed, bathed and ready to play. I really was a little disappointed that I was not doing those things, because I could handle taking care of my own child (but in some ways I was so thankful that Mathilda took care of the major things). Karis usually goes to sleep between 6:30 to 7:30 but I let her play and kept her entertained by watching her 1 set of DVDs. She finally went to sleep at 8:30 and that set the tone for the rest of the nights (sleeping between 8:30 to 9:00). Her sleep pattern was shot the first night! What could I have done, she knew her mother was missing and she needed the DVDs to settle her prior to going to sleep. Sara also had worked at getting her to sleep in her own crib and that also was shot. I needed to keep her close so I could wake up if she woke up in the middle of the night and so from the first night on, she wouldn’t even take day naps in her crib the whole time. We had to place her on our bed in order to get her to take a nap.
The first day was not the worst as the week progressed. Day 2: Tuesday started as a nice day. I took Karis into work for 30 minutes to get some paper work done to admit our guard’s wife, Loveness, to the hospital and returned home to spend time with Karis. I thought that the next day after Sara was gone would be the most difficult for Karis and so decided to stay home from work the majority of the day. One of my friends, Lisa, came over to lend me some additional children’s DVDs and we spent time talking while Karis played with her son Lenny. Lisa and Lenny left and things were going well until I got a call from the pastor taking Loveness to the hospital for admission as I had instructed him to do. He also told me that she was bleeding from a place on her leg, (this was not surprising as that was the reason for the admission) and that they were going to the emergency department first. I agreed with the logic and told him to keep me informed. I got a call 40 minutes later to be told that she had passed away. This on the other hand was a huge shock and surprise! This changed the whole next few days. I left Karis at home with Matilda at that point and left to go assist our guard. I came home tired and emotionally exhausted and let Karis dictate the events of the evening before retiring for the night. She wanted to watch the new DVDs and these new DVDs were a relief from the ones that we have been watching for over 5 months now.
Day 3 without Sara. This day began early with having to go to work for a portion of the day and the funeral the rest of the day. The details of this tragic story will be another blog. Poor Mathilda was left taking care of Karis for the majority of the day and I only relieved her around 6:30 in the evening. Again, because Mahtilda must think that men are not supposed to do child rearing activities, Karis was fed, bathed and dressed for bed by the time I got home. The moment Karis would see me, she was ready to play. We stayed up another night playing and watching the new DVDs that are from Australia. The videos are “Play School” and consist of nursery rhymes in an Aussie accent. I think Karis is going to end up with an Aussie accent after watching these videos!
Day 4: Sara is coming home! I was able to spend some time at home with Karis. I put up a swing in the front yard and entertained her by pushing her in the swing. She enjoyed the swing and wanted to spend most of the time there. I also took her on errands around town like to the National Health Science Research Council to submit a research proposal. People here love seeing children and don’t object to having a child being brought. Finally, I went to work with Sara on the way home from her Safari and to resume mommy duties. Sara was missed during this time, but Karis and I did bond though our delinquent behaviors…eating whatever she wanted, sleeping whenever and where-ever she wanted and doing whatever she wanted. I think the only saving grace was that she still spent more time at home with Mathilda than me and that probably kept Karis semi-civilized.
Difficult weekLessons: As a dad you just try to survive these trials by getting rid of all rules that you thought were easy to enforce. Stay at home moms and dads are truly super-hero’s. The energy, the creativeness, the discipline that is required 24 hours a day to keep these little ones going is exhausting. I am so thankful for Mathilda.
*Pictures taken previously but this is basically what happened (watch DVDs and eat whatever you want- chocolate cake, etc)
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